So long, farewell

Dear everyone,

In answer the that commonly asked question 'What's new pussy cat?' (and no, I've never been asked that either) THIS is what's new: I'm departing my current position working with Youth With a Mission. 

Below is the e-mail I sent out to all the lovely folk I've been working and living in community with. In reading it you'll realise that we're not the most bunch, and don't worry I did the 'grown-up' discussion and official departure conversation in a much more conventional way (the medium of dance).

Suffice it to say that I've had an ace time, learned a huge amount, made from super duper friends and seen God do some pretty cool stuff - not least in my own heart. 

It is however time to move on. 

I'm going to keep this blog though, basically because I like it. The format will just change a bit. The content will still vary from thoughtful to ridiculous and I hope that people still find it a little bit entertaining. 

High fives for a fun 14 months.

Over the past year our team has grown to 19 people.

http://asbojesus.wordpress.com/

'Place ministry here' (L) 'Jesus' (R)

Interestingly enough my arts team and I were having a talk about this last month and produced this on a wall where we live to remind ourselves about where we place Jesus and our ministries. 
We weren't only discussing the level of importance we assign to each but also how we can elevate things and people (ministry, leaders, friends) above the need of our prayer and support because of the pedestals we put them on in our minds.

"If the church wants a better Pastor it only needs to pray for the one it has"

Start date + Wrong worship

It pains me how accurate this can be and I include myself in this.

Start Date + Rocks and Snakes

For what seems like hours she waits at the door rehearsing in her head the questions that have stolen her concentration.

Heaven forbid the words come out inarticulate. 

She stands in hope that the door might open and he may pass on his way out so she might quickly ask him.

The day grows dim and the air goes cool. 

Timidly she knocks not knowing if he will even answer.

Maybe he's just sat down and doesn't want to be bothered. Maybe he's out and the house is empty. 

She raises her fist to knock again. Somewhere in side the house footsteps make their way towards her. 

The door opens with no urgency. Wearily he looks down at the girl and hurriedly gestures her inside. 

So the neighbors don't see. 

He lays a table before her; silver platters adorned with snakes writhing on rubble.

It sounds extreme but for a long time I've felt that these are the actions of the God who I serve. 

I'll have a decision to make or a worry in my head and I might pray about them but not truly submit them to God for fear of his reaction. 

In my head the scene unfolds much like the one above and yet it goes against all the teaching I've been fed since I was a child. 

 “Ask and it will be given to you; seek and you will find; knock and the door will be opened to you. ⁸ For everyone who asks receives; the one who seeks finds; and to the one who knocks, the door will be opened.⁹ “Which of you, if your son asks for bread, will give him a stone? ¹⁰ Or if he asks for a fish, will give him a snake? ¹¹ If you, then, though you are evil, know how to give good gifts to your children, how much more will your Father in heaven give good gifts to those who ask him!' Matthew 7:7-10

There's an exclamation mark at the end of that verse and I think I need it.

I fear that if I knock, when God opens the door I'll have caught him at the wrong time or he'll end up wearily showing me where I've asked this same question before and reason that if I didn't listen previously why should he tell me again?

Yet this doesn't reflect his true character.

The persistent widow (Luke 18) badgered the judge until he saw to it she got justice and yet even with the permission to go to God in a such a way, I don't. 

"And will not God bring about justice for his chosen ones, who cry out to him day and night? Will he keep putting them off? I tell you, he will see that they get justice, and quickly. However, when the Son of Man comes, will he find faith on the earth?” Luke 18:7-8

What I've realised is that I don't cry out day and night. I cry out once or twice (3 times a lay-day) and then get bored of myself, expecting God to feel the same way. 

And yet the Bible teaches that I'm not insignificant to him.

He promises not to put me off but to answer QUICKLY.

And these answers aren't going to be bad for me. 

The God I've been serving in my head has high expectations on me and won't help me reach them. 

He set my feet not on a rock but tripping over them.

When I lay things at his feet he disregards them or exchanges them for a serpent, if one comes to hand. 

This warped image of God I've been serving has definitely affected my ability to be one of his representatives recently. 

Yet he gently points this out and shows me His true character. He never tires of hearing from me, the gifts he gives me are good and he's not going to snatch them out of my hands. 

He is truly to be feared but I'm not to be fearful because He is Love and perfect love casts out all fear.

http://www.ywamliverpool.co.uk/

 

 

This is a little painting I created for my friends who work for YWAM in Liverpool.